Memories of 2009

At first glance, I didn't find 2009 to be anything special in terms of film. I always lament that year after year the quality of Hollywood has been waning, to say the least, and that it will never live up to the golden years of cinema, the late 60's to early 70's. But I've just realized a flaw in my logic, I've just found, through Screen Memories, that I've been looking through an askew perspective. I need to look at films in terms of moments, in terms of feelings and thoughts, in terms of emotional impact and the way it has affected or influenced me. When I view the world of film through these eyes, in surprisingly sharp 35mm, I'm able to see that every year has its moments that have helped shape the mold of my existence. I find that this is the reason I will forever love film.

Paranormal Activity reminded me what it was like to be afraid of the things that may lurk in the dark. Or, better yet, the things that may lurk in the dark recesses of your mind. A week after seeing this film, I wasn't able to sleep with the lights off, I wasn't able to walk into a room without closing my eyes and frantically scratching the paint off the walls in search of a light switch. I hated this movie. Just absolutely loathed it's very existence, but I later realized why: it worked. It did what it was designed to do, and it did it with a cheap camera and two people in a room. I'll be honest, I don't even like talking about this film to people because I then think of scenes, and the scenes bring back memories I've been trying to store away in my subconscious. Thanks, A.O. Scott, I won't be sleeping well tonight.

Food, Inc. reaffirmed why I have been a vegetarian for so long. It's always a good thing to remember the reasons you did something, especially when that something is as gross as recalling that beef is drenched in feces and sprayed with ammonia. That rinsing sound is me brushing my teeth as to rid my mouth of the vomit that just came up. I show this film to people, not as a way to preach, but as a way to educate, and they usually have the same disgusted reaction, only to later resort back to their methods. Oh well, you can't win them all. If I change one life with this film then the film has done its job and was worth every cent they put into making it.

The Hurt Locker was a shining example of tension and many moments had me holding my breath in the middle of the theater. With a family member having served in Iraq, I certainly felt some semblance of what it would be like to endure something this shattering. Of course, my cinematic experience would never compare to the reality of the situation, but that's what made this film so good, it brings you close, it takes you there. My relative said this was the closest that a film has come to capturing Iraq, and the feeling of being good at what you do, even if it is the only thing you're good at, and it's such an existential experience to watch this film and then find realization within yourself that there is an ultimate truth being presented to you through this film. An a shattering, enlightening, moving, profound truth it is. This would be my top pick for film of the year if it wasn't for....

Inglourious Basterds. I make no apologies for being a fan of Tarantino, or for enjoying this film for what it was. Tarantino has made a few clunkers, and really, his only good films were Pulp and Reservoir, but this is Tarantino getting it right, going back to those two. The main reason I love this film is because it has one of the best characters, at least in my opinion, that film has ever seen: Christoph Waltz's stellar acting through the character of Hans Landa. I want to be this character! Such strength, such confidence, such prowess and so sure of himself and his ability. My eyes were the size of saucers when I fell in love with him. I wanted to model my own inner strength around this character's, and this was a BAD guy! You're not supposed to like, let alone LOVE, the bad guy.

So, even though 2009 wasn't my favorite year for film, I find that it was still way up there and provided movie moments, self-realizations and sources of inspiration. All it takes is the way you look at it, but more than that, it's what you see that counts. And in 2009 I saw many things that moved the mountain of my emotions.